Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Today, Tomorrow and the next day after that – 5 Apr 11

What can I say that has not been said already? Our daughter’s dreams vaporized as well as her hopes of marrying her best friend. All this happened while I was at home rehearsing my soon to be famous “Father of the Bride speech”. The day she told us her news I wanted to tell her that over the years my heart two has been broken and that she is not alone. I wanted to go on and say that she will get over this and the sun will come out tomorrow. That she will be stronger and better prepared for a life that has both love and its share of sadness. Throughout our daughter’s darkest days I have been waiting patiently on the sidelines wanting to make her world better. What I wouldn’t give to take her in my arms and wipe away her sorrow just like when she was my baby girl. But I can’t take away her sorrow, her pain, and I can’t repair her broken heart. This pain that she feels is beyond my capabilities, the superman that I once was to her is now only a distant memory.

To hear her cry and bare her soul for all to see is something that I pray I will never witness again. My heart broke as our daughter’s world crumbled down around her. I wanted to assure her that in pure numbers alone she is one of millions of people that have suffered a postponement of a wedding. I wanted to assure her that life isn’t fair, that relationships are priceless, and that life has its share of heartbreak. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But all this is just words of comfort that will be spoken by many, but never heard by one.

But broken hearts are what give us strength, understanding and compassion. They say that a heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect. All these words mean nothing as you hear her vulnerability on the phone.

I want to believe that her life will get better and that each day she will be stronger and less vulnerable. I hope and pray that her heart mends and that they resolve their problems whether it be together or apart. I know this hasn’t been easy for either of them. Right wrong or indifferent the future is for them to decide. What bothers me is that all the well wishers mean only the best, but what it actually comes down to is all the eyes are on them right now. I just hope that you ignore their whispers as you both pass by.

What happened I’m asked is always the second question after is Jacki OK? I don’t know, and I’m guessing that even they can’t begin to give you an honest answer. What I can say is that if it was meant to be it will happen. If it wasn’t then close out that chapter of your life and move on. Don’t wait until the final chapter to realize that you could have altered the ending.

If you need me I will be on the sidelines cheering you on no matter the outcome.

Just remember I was the first man that you loved and I have loved you unconditionally always and forever!

Dad

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