Monday, May 2, 2011

BR 549 – 2 May 2011

Let me be the first to say that I’m Ok and back on my feet again (kind of). Last Saturday while helping Jacki and Zach move the kids play house from their old place to their new place I might have over done it just a bit. (Insert Susan’s voice saying “You’re not as young as you use to be”) It’s not my fault; I have always been a guy that likes getting his hands dirty. As a senior leader in the Army I was never the guy who sat behind his desk and directed others to do the work. I have always believed in “lead by example” instead of the much preferred “do as I say, not as I do method” that others at my rank have so easily adopted. With that being said I was right there with the young pups trying to lift the oversized plywood playhouse off my trailer. The playhouse stands about 12-13 feet built out of 4x4s, 2x4s, 2x6s, and half inch plywood complete with a newly shingled roof. The three of us were trying to lift it from lying on its side to standing back upright. After a fumbled attempt I said enough was enough and went to get the 4 wheeler with winch. I didn’t want to get anyone hurt and knew it would be somewhat safer with the 4 wheeler.

After it was standing upright again I was loading the 4 wheeler back on the trailer when it happened. I was bent over moving the ramps when my back went out. I felt like my upper torso was a spinning top pivoting on my stationary lower torso. I might have looked like Gumby or SpongeBob Square pants under the influence as I moved around trying to stop the hurt. I know if I was watching some guy going through the motions that I was probably going through I too might have laughed. So I do forgive you Josh and Zach for laughing, but Zach the pooping comment that you made to Jacki really wasn’t that funny.

The trip back from Mankato that day was by far worse than riding my motorcycle back from the west coast back in 1982 after my motorcycle accident. I was still driving because of the car trailer behind and the fact that we still had to pick up a set of doors from my brother Doug on our way home. I didn’t want to relinquish the driving to anyone else and felt as comfortable as I could be given the circumstances. Propped behind the wheel supporting myself by my elbows and knees took my mind off the pain. I wanted to take the pain medicine after I backed up the trailer at Doug’s and after we loaded the doors just in case I became under the influence. The old song from “Heehaw” came to mind as I hummed a few bars of “If it weren’t for bad luck I wouldn’t have no luck at all gloom to spare and agony on me” under my breath as we headed north.

The next few weeks were/are going to be busy to say the least. I have so much to do to get ready for building my garage in less than two weeks. I was supposed to be in Montana on a business trip this week. Susan and I were going to drive out and spend some much needed time together going through North Dakota on our way out and South Dakota on our way home. I envisioned stops at Crazy Horse, Mount Rushmore, Old Faithful and the badlands. I know so much to do, and so much to see in just five days. But if nothing else was accomplished being alone for five days with my bride would have been awesome. With me living at the cabin and her at the house our time together is precious. After the events of the past week I believe a trip out to Montana was just what the doctor would have ordered.

After we got home from Mankato I went to bed to try and get better. I had already taken the muscle relaxant that Doctor Zach gave me and was hoping to sleep it off. Josh left for work and Susan ran to town and I unfortunately had to go to the bathroom. I grabbed the pizza plate off of the night stand beside me and headed off. I wasn’t quite done yet going to pee when Gumby and SpongeBob came back to teach me to dance. I didn’t want to crash into the toilet or land in tub so I moved somewhat faster than a caterpillar tying his 16 pairs of sneakers as I headed back to the sanctuary of our bedroom. I made it as far as the hallway when it was either drop down to my knees now or tumble into the drywall in front of me. I opted to drop to my knees than face the embarrassment of the crash and burn method I was faced with. I made it as far as the bedroom floor when I was stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn’t go forward, back ward, or climb Mt Rushmore to my bed that beckoned me. I was in a position right out of some KungFoo movie as I laid there crouched on the floor in agony. The only thing that kept me sane was Bella and Mikey as they waited for me to let go of the pizza plate. Rather than help me their only thought was you distract him and I will get the plate out of his hand. Two or three different times they attempted to get the plate from me. I’m not sure how much longer I could keep them from the plate but I was determined.

I was still on the floor 25-35 minutes when I heard the garage door opener engage. When Susan walked in minutes later I was so relieved I told her I needed some help and know she was surprised to find me lying there on the floor. I admit this would have been a great time for one of those I’ve fallen and can’t get up commercials to be produced. I know water may have escaped my eyes as Susan gave me the support I needed to get up again. The embarrassment of her calling 911 seemed to be all I needed to get up on my feet again. After careful maneuvering I was able to stand somewhat upright, get some sleep pants and slippers on and then navigate to the top of the stairs. Standing at the top of the steps it looked to me like it was at least a mile to the landing below. Instead it was only seven steps that saved me from an ambulance ride.

I’m not sure how I got to the emergency room once I got in the car. The bumps lining Seventh Avenue were rough to say the least but the end definitely justified the means. Susan left my side for a little while at the entrance to the ER propping me up on the wall while she parked her car. After a few shots of morphine and some muscle relaxant in the emergency room I’m on the road to recovery. I have never been in that much pain before nor do I want to be ever again. As I type this blog I am sitting like an old man in my living room reclined in my non brand named Lazy boy recliner with a blanket covering my lap writing. Hopefully tomorrow after I see my chiropractor I will be better and head off to work.

All I can say is protect your back while you can otherwise you could end up in the recliner next to me cursing those seven stairs to the outside. To my wife Susan I know the past week was a tough one for you. I just thank you for being my rock through the recovery process. I will get better soon and someday God willing we will dance either a Waltz or a Fox trot at our 25th Wedding anniversary.

So if anyone should ask you if you got the license number of the truck that hit me it was BR 549 and Lady Destiny was not driving it!

That’s all for now,

Dave

1 comment:

  1. Oh Dave, I don't know what to say....give me a minute to stop laughing and to wipe away the tears!
    Okay, sorry to hear that you are/were in so much pain. Hope you feel better soon.
    Heather

    ReplyDelete